


Gates of Gold and Death

by dysprosium (blueism)



Series: Glass. [Dream Angst] [3]
Category: Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Hurt Clay | Dream (Video Blogging RPF), Hurt/Comfort, Mentioned GeorgeNotFound (Video Blogging RPF), Mentioned Luke | Punz, Mentioned Phil Watson (Video Blogging RPF), Mentioned Technoblade (Video Blogging RPF), Mentioned Toby Smith | Tubbo, Mentioned TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), Mentioned Wilbur Soot, Other, Suicide Attempt, Usage of real names, aaaa pretty much it, damn thats a lot of mentioned, ik its supposed to be angst but i kinda wanna practice comfort, uhh basically dre is suicidal
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-27
Updated: 2021-01-27
Packaged: 2021-03-13 15:28:17
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,023
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29030949
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/blueism/pseuds/dysprosium
Summary: Dream's had enough of all of this.
Relationships: Clay | Dream & Sapnap (Video Blogging RPF), implied Clay | Dream/GeorgeNotFound (Video Blogging RPF)
Series: Glass. [Dream Angst] [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2126262
Comments: 8
Kudos: 176





	Gates of Gold and Death

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Burning the past, drowning the future.](https://archiveofourown.org/works/27808321) by [It_is_Rene_Now](https://archiveofourown.org/users/It_is_Rene_Now/pseuds/It_is_Rene_Now). 



> heya! thanks for checking this out ^^

He took a deep breath. This was perfectly fine. He was going to click send, and everything would be great. He’d be gone. He’d treated everyone just fine. They didn’t return it. George concocted those stories. He hadn’t done it, yet everyone turned on him. It stung. It stung a lot. He supposed it was fine. The sting would be dulled soon anyhow. His finger hit the phone screen. 

**Dream  
@Dream**

The sky’s pretty.

_[goldengate.png]_

It was pretty obvious what he was about to do. Just because of curiosity, he decided to check Discord. One last time. He went to the Dream SMP group, just to see what they’d say.

[Badboyhalo]: DONT DREAM DONT

[WilburSoot]: Dream, don’t do it-

[Technoblade]: Dream, please don’t jump

[TommyInnit]: Big D, dont you fucking do it

[Sapnap]: Clay I swear to fucking god, don’t you dare @Dream

He allowed himself a grim, melancholy smile as he typed something out.

[Dream]: Love you, pandas. 

[Dream]: Thank you for everything, everyone.

[Dream]: This is pretty much an “It was never meant to be moment”, no?

[Tubbo_]: Yes?

[Dream]: It was never meant to be, I guess.

He set his phone down on the ground, not waiting to see the explosion it’d cause amongst his old friends. He pushed himself off of the ledge. What even was worth it anymore? Everyone had turned on him, despite the evidence that he hadn’t been abusive at all to George. The wind flew past him. He watched, almost detached, as the swathe of ocean blue that would be his death approached. Closer. Closer. It hit. He blacked out.

\----

He woke. He hated it. Why couldn’t he even commit suicide correctly? How much of a fucking failure was he? A hand was gripping his arm, almost too tightly. He bit his lip. He was probably jacked up on painkillers. He’d thought, that the 98% death rate would finish him. Apparently not. All his ‘luck’ ever brought him was pain. Case in point.

“Clay?” Sapnap’s voice filtered through his head, somehow making its way through his sleep-muddled state. He made a noise of acknowledgement. Sapnap swallowed. “Why?”

“You’re smart, Sap. You know why, don’t you?”

“I-,” Sapnap didn’t finish his sentence. He couldn’t. It was too painful.

“I bet once news gets out that I survived, that there’ll be people saying, ‘Oh, Dream didn’t jump at all, it was a lie to get more views’,” liquid laced with salt began dripping down his cheeks as he continued, “They’ll say that I’m just a liar, that I should’ve died. I’m so sick of this, Nick.”

“People’ll be just as glad to know you survived, right?” Sapnap asked, trying to soothe him.

“For every nice comment there is, every supportive comment, there’s two bitter comments,” he started, “it gets to you eventually.”

Sapnap opened his mouth. Closed it. Opened it again. He couldn’t refute that claim. He saw this and just smiled. 

“How bad?”

“Left leg’s broken. Right foot’s broken too.”

“Ah,” he made a noise of acknowledgement. 

“Clay, everyone was worried. They felt they’d made a mistake.”

“Funny how they only realized that after I attempted self-murder, mm?”

Sapnap closed his eyes. He opened them, inhaled deeply and then spoke again, “Clay, how can I help you?”

“I’m not sure you’re able to fix this one, Pandas.”

“I can try, can’t I?”

“I guess you could, but do you really want to? I don’t think anyone else would care if you didn’t. You don’t have to feel obligated to do so.”

“Clay, what don’t you- sorry- fucking get? I’m your friend, aren’t I? Friends help eachother! I don’t feel obligated.”

“Friends also stick together, shouldn’t they?”

“Look, I’m sorry about what happened to you. I really am, and I know you weren’t responsible. But, for the love of whatever higher being there may or may not be up there, this is different. This was you trying to what- erase yourself permanently?”

“That’s fine. You’re the only one who’d actually miss me. Maybe Bad too, but that’s basically as far as it’d go.”

“It’s not fine to me. You’ve been my best friend for so long now. I can’t- I can’t imagine what it’d be like to lose you.”

“I- I guess you’ve made your point.”

Sapnap leaned back into his chair with a huff, releasing his tight grip on his friend’s arm. “I better well have.”

\----  
[Discord Chat, Dream SMP]

[WilburSoot]: Sapnap, update?

[Sapnap]: we had an argument, resolved tho

[The_Eret]: Alright.

[Nihachu]: He’s fine though, right?

[Sapnap]: If you count a broken leg and foot as fine, yes

[Punz]: Yeah, I don’t think so-

[Sapnap]: Mmm

[WilburSoot]: I just feel so horrid, like I should’ve known something was up

[Sapnap]: He went dark, it was pretty hard to tell if something was wrong.

[WilburSoot]: Yeah but it still feels horrible

[Ph1lza]: Don’t blame yourself, Wil

[WilburSoot]: How can one not? One of my friends just- just fucking catapulted himself off of the damn Golden Gate

[Technoblade]: Listen to Phil

[Ph1lza]: Thank you, Tech

[Technoblade]: Anytime.

\----  
Silence was oddly comforting, he thought. There was no expectations. No constant toxicity. No consistently waiting to be yelled at. He enjoyed silence, he really did. He decided to break it, as much as he liked it.

“How long was I out?”

“... Two weeks.” The answer mildly fazed him. 

“Much longer till it heals?”

“‘Bout four to six weeks more,” came Sapnap’s answer.

“Uhm- anything permanent?”

“No, don’t believe so.”

“Mmm, okay.” Conversation seemingly over, silence drenched the room once more before he added on.

“Sapnap?”

“Yeah, Dream?”

“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have doubted you- I’m so fucking sorry.”

“Shh,” his best friend soothed. He was good at that. “It’s alright, Dream. Just relax and please just say that you won’t scare me to death like that again.”

“I- I don’t really know if I can.”

“That’s fine. I’ll just help rectify that issue then, Dream.” A smile from him this time around.

“Thank you, Pandas.”

 **Sapnap  
** @Sapnap  
Going dark for a while.

And in Discord, he put:

[Sapnap]: Helping Dream

That was all they really needed to know.

**Author's Note:**

> heya thanks for making it  
> DUDE WAS I THAT DEPRIVED OF BRAINCELLS THAT I SAID THANKS FOR MAKING IT WHAAAA  
> i decided i wanted to do this so here lol  
> ty for reading, kudos and comments are appreciated :D  
> i did this in about 30 minutes so its not the best i could do but oh well
> 
> smh its inaccurate, theyve built like guards under the bridge to prevent suicide so take this inaccurate piece and run


End file.
